I also would love for her to be totally healthy. I would love for her to stop being so fussy. I would especially love to know if she is crying because she hurts, or because she simply is crying. And if she hurts, I want to know why and fix it. And if she is simply crying, why?
Basically, the update is, Norah is still fussy....actually really fussy. Albeit, she is also really happy. But also a lot of fussy....weird huh. She is still not sleeping.
I have nearly pulled my hair out numerous times this week. I have screamed into pillow at least twice, I have cried once....ok maybe twice, I felt sorry for myself at least 100 times, and I have prayed a bunch. I am tired. Not just tired physically, but tired mentally.
However.....I had an "aha" moment (for those of you who know this is an Oprah phrase, you now know I am officially a stay at home mom.) during American Idol this week. One of my favorite girls, Katelyn sang "Nobody said it was easy." and it just hit me. (Only the title, the song is not even remotely applicable :) It isn't supposed to be easy, and yes some people may have it easier, but a lot have it much harder as well, and it's never easy. And I should actually be honored knowing that God never gives us more than we can handle, because he knows I can handle her and how hard this really is. And it could be much worse. We have a beautiful healthy, for the most part and the parts that aren't I believe are small and manageable, baby. I am staying at home to raise her, with a husband (a great one) in a beautiful home, with wonderful grandparents, aunts, uncles and friends around us. We live in an amazing country, and we are so blessed. So, as I write this, I'm going to stop feeling sorry for myself. I'm going to stop wishing she would just be over this all and enjoy every moment. (I know I've said this before, but believe me, reminding myself is a necessity!)
A look back at Norah's first 8 months!
1 month.
2 months.
3 months.
4 months.
5 months
6 months.
7 months.
8 months.
1 comment:
I'm so touched by and can easily relate to this post. I know those feelings of being overwhelmed and confused and then guilty that you felt sorry for yourself when billions of others have problems a million times worse. Oh, I know those feelings! If you will, let me suggest that maybe sometimes God does give us more than we can handle. More than we can handle on our OWN, but certainly not more than we can handle with HIM. Remember that our trials are meant to refine us and to remind us of our reliance on Christ. The physical and mental exhaustion you feel is enough to make anyone a bit nuts. I know because I've been there for the greater part of the past 4 years! Keep coming to Him for energy and to be filled up with His grace, patience and love. You and sweet Norah will make it through to the other side-a side where sleep is sweet and you value a solid 6 hours sleep more than ever before! :) I'll continue to pray for your family as I pray for my own similar situations. And no matter how tired you get, the smile of that little girl of yours can surely light up your eyes! She's a true gem. Be blessed today, friend. :)
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